Pronto. Eyin for short. Euthymic. Strive to win a war. Things that i wrote in this blog can be a true story and can be just one of my fantasy. What's written in entry, let it stay right there. No need to talk bout it. Feel unpleasant with my story? Just click cross at top of your tab.

My obsession.

1.32 a.m. I'm still wide awake. Rasanya aku dah balik ke routine lama ; tidur lambat, bangun lambat. Masa mula-mula datang balik penyakit susah tidur ni, selalu sangat kena attack dengan headache and sometimes jadi migraine. Now dah terbiasa so it's like a normal condition to me.
Hati aku? Alhamdulillah dah tak sakit macam before ni. Dah start heal slowly. Ada masanya aku rasa berat dekat hati ni, macam... kena hempap dengan batu. But most of the time i felt nothing. Zero. Kosong. Emotionless. Kau bayangkan satu pulau yang tak ada penghuni, sunyi sepi. Haa macam tu lah hati aku.
I get through each day by staying up all night then tidur lepas subuh. Pukul 2 petang baru bangun. Bangun terus mandi and bersiap untuk amik mama balik kerja. Sampai rumah, tolong mama prepare juadah untuk berbuka. Lepas berbuka aku akan masuk bilik and masuk ke alam maya.
Haha pathetic kan? I got no one to talk to. Kawan-kawan? Ahh dah malas nak bebankan diorang dengan masalah aku. Kesian. Diorang pon ada masalah sendiri. Takkan hari-hari nak melayan aku pulak kan? Lagipon aku dah okay. Takde meroyan tak tentu hala. I can control myself now.
Raya pon dah nak dekat. Less than a week, to be exact. So rumah aku dah start riuh & we were busy preparing for the becoming eid. It's quite distracting lah. Tak ada lah rasa macam lifeless or sunyi sangat bila dah busy. After raya dah kena prepare barang untuk masuk MSU pulak. Nak kena settlekan hal rumah sewa pulak ni. 03 Ogos dah kena pergi daftar then...... i'll be back to student life haha rindu jugak nak buat assignment, rindu nak ada ramai kawan, rindu nak merungut pergi kelas, rindu nak berebut-rebut dekat cafe waktu lunch, rindu nak buat aktiviti kolej. Aku excited & takut in the same time. Excited nak mula life baru. Takut kalau-kalau suasana dekat sana tak sama macam dekat uitm. Kolej swasta kan penuh dengan anak orang kaya, high class. Risau jugak kalau-kalau aku tak dapat nak fit in their society. But hopefully everything will be just fine. Amin !

To everyone yang baca my blog ni, i would like to wish you guys selamat hari raya aidilfitri. Aku minta maaf kalau aku ada buat salah, ada sakitkan hati, ada menyinggung perasaan kau, ada terkasar bahasa or buat kau kecil hati tanpa sedar. And if i owe you anything, even if 5 sen sekalipon, please please please tell me. Sometimes aku lupa. Tell me and i'll pay back your money. Yang akan balik kampung tu, drive safely. Semoga kita semua selamat sampai ke destinasi masing-masing. Makan rendang tu beringat sikit ye. Jangan sampai terlebih makan haha. Nothing can beat perasaan beraya dengan family. To those yang sudah tiada ibu bapa, Al-Fatihah for your loss. Last but not least, yang terpaksa beraya di perantauan, be strong guys and selamat berhari raya di negara orang :)

Assalamualaikum.